Sunday, July 29, 2012

I was told by two of the three corners of the "triad of evil" that all which would required of me was to write two of these posts a week. Not an unreasonable request if you desire tranquility and are in the center of the perfect storm. I was also informed the keys to my beloved Can-Am could go missing in action should I fail to do so by 'She Who Should Not Be Named."

You should also understand that even as I blog (something I'm really thrilled to do), the sun is shinning, it's seventy-five degrees outside and there is no rain in the forecast for today! "SWSNBN" suggested it was the perfect time to obey and comply...therefore I blog.

I'm befuddled by the need to blog...who cares what I think and I'm convinced certain people could care less about what I'd prefer to be doing at this moment in time(did I mention the weather?).

I see that some ninety folks have taken a look at this little section of the web reserved just for me. Thank you for not leaving any comments. I'm fairly sure if that starts to happen, life as I love it will end. The triad of evil will take note and decide I should reply to each and every one who is so generous as to comment on my ramblings.

A small note to the four misfits of my misspent youth. Two of your wives have told me you've already visited here. take heed:

I know where you live. I have pictures from Hong Kong, Oki and of course various bars in the Far East the four of you have been thrown out of. Go ahead take your very best shot.

Now something of value for anyone who cares what I've seen or found of interest in my quest to stay off the skyline. I discovered a web site devoted to folks who read and write about the military. This group is dedicated to preserving military history one story at a time.Even if you don't write to survive...they have some really talent writers who are members, this makes for a really excellent source to find not only fiction, but historical facts.

I noted some of the books I've read and enjoyed were mentioned there. I was also pleased to find some of the authors who wrote those stories were part of the group. Why they let me join is a mystery(guess I caught them with their guard down), but I joined them. I would recommend anyone who enjoys books founded on fact(fiction or non-fiction) visit this web site. it will be an asset in your search for really great reads with the ring of truth. Check out on Facebook:

Military Writers Society of America

One more thing I've noticed and then I'm out of here for the day(with any luck).

I was chatting with a super lady who is a teacher, author, and mother. Yes her candle burns at both ends and the middle.
During the chat the subject of one or two star book reviews came up. I've noted that if you have some fairly decent ratings and reviews, then get a "I hate you and everything you write love letter," a strange thing will happen. I've received three of these hemorrhoids and each time they've happened---sales went up. Now I'm not suggesting you should actively seek hate mail....but I would suggest these might be silver linings in you pocket...so smile, they can't hurt you and as matter of fact they might even help.

I've taken the time to research the folks who love me so much, that they can't help but express that love in bad ratings and reviews. They would be appalled at how easy it can be to find information on anyone today. Two were authors with books you had to dig under the outhouse to find and one stated with pride she'd read all of three books this year. Now if you can't find humor in that...well you should be blogging or writing reviews.

There was one reviewer on Amazon who commented on my grammar as a way of pointing out the knowledge I don't possess. You should read the comment a fine and clearly intelligent woman named Kee made. Short...sharp...and well aimed right at the heart. Makes a body feel good to see that type of defense.

CAN-AM time!


              
   
          

Thursday, July 26, 2012

   I am not a blooger...will never be a blooger... and have no interest in blogging. I also am caught in an evil triad: my wife, my publisher and my publisher's advertiseing agent. So as any married man can well understand...I am in the survival mode. They said I should blog...therefore I blog.
   I wanted to write a book....my wife allowed me to write a book. She wanted it published...I decided it should be published(only the silent survive). I found a publisher who said she would do all the work...therefore I'm published. The publisher turned me over to her advertiseing department....therefore I blog.
   All should understand I'm an abused diva author, who is barely able to follow my three greastest passions in life: my motorcycle, my bottle of Ten High, and the next poker game with my brothers(I need their money). I barely find enough time for my morning and afternoon naps because of the triad's demands.
   Should anyone read this and think they detect a small amount of sarcasm, you would be wrong. You will have mistaken fear for that most dangerous form of human communication with women(which I would never use around my triad) sarcasm.
   The only reason I agreed (fear in no may was a part of my decision) to do this is revenge. The pen is not mightier than the sword...just ask anyone who has been stabbed by both for comformation of that statement of fact. But a well sharpened pen can be just as satisfying as a well aimed round from a sniiper's rifle. I was promised I could use this any way I saw fit if I would agree to write on it from time to time.
   Never give a much abused diva author any weapon without restrictions. You want me to write a blog...as you have said so shall it be. I was also told that if I took offense(not that my taking offense could ever happen) to some stupid comment made by a reviewer I could return fire. Now there's something I do understand.
   One lady said about one of the books I wrote,"Does this man not know the difference between fractured and broken? They are the same!"
   Well dear lady yes this man does understand the difference. Fractured means some tape...mabe a cast and back to the field with a light duty chit. Broken means pins, possibly screws and the ever popular rehab (room 3021-west wing) for a few fun filled days. I may not be a smart man...but trust me...I know the difference.
    Don't complain about my use of grammar or punctuation. I write the way I think and the comma for me is a rest stop on the way to the end. I have an editor...another woman...she's still getting over her last nervous breakdown from working on my last book. I intend to put her right back into a rubber room with what I'm working on now. She has all she can do to make my junk readable and has even hinted I'm stubborn about making the changes she suggested.
   Leave your comments at your own risk, I have notthing but time on my hands.

Doug Lucas